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Archive for October, 2007

Little Blog is for the birds

If Little Blog has her way, South Africa’s bird life will soon have equal political rights.

She is sitting at the window, staring out at the garden.

Dad: “What are you watching, Little Blog?”

Little Blog: “The birds in our garden. Some of them are free but some of them aren’t.”

Dad: “Which birds aren’t free?”

Little Blog: “The ones with a name tag aren’t free.”

Dad: “Aren’t all the birds in our garden free?”

Little Blog: “No, birds aren’t free. If there’s a bird and it’s got a name tag and it hasn’t got a cage, it belongs to somebody. If it flies away to someone’s garden, sometimes they’re kind enough to take their collar off and let them be free and then nobody knows they actually belong to somebody. That’s the way I like them to be.”

Dad: ”Where do you see name tags, Little Blog?”

Read the rest of this entry »

Little Blog vs Vegetables

Little Blog’s big sister, Sunshine, has discovered chemistry. She found the periodic table in one of her books, and a friend has been explaining to her about the elements and their names.

“O is Oxygen and H is Hydrogen and when you put two Hydrogens with one Oxygen, you get H2O and that is really water,” she explains over supper to Little Blog, who pretends to absorb every word.

Dad decides to show how clever he is: “And H2SO4 is Hydrochloric Acid, which destroys everything it touches.” He hastens to add that he only knows this because of a rhyme he memorised in high school. Before anyone can stop him, he recites it:

“Little Johnny has gone to heaven,
and will be seen no more,
For what he took for H2O,
was H2SO4.”

Little Blog instantly declares: “He was lucky.”

Sunshine is horrified: “Why, Little Blog?!”

Little Blog: “Well, then he wouldn’t have to eat his vegetables, would he?”


World Cup win & Little Blog’s new career

Little Blog has been unstoppable since waking up this morning and discovering that South Africa won the rugby World Cup.

“Just like I said they will!” she crows to anyone who will listen.

She also believes that this heralds a new career: “I can tell you who is going to win anything from now on!”

Now everyone wants to test her.

Read the rest of this entry »

Little Blog predicts SA rugby victory

Little Blog is caught up in the rugby fever. The problem is, her home’s multiple sports allegiances has her a little confused.

Sunshine decides to test her: “Who is going to win the World Cup, Little Blog?”

Little Blog: “South Africa, of course!”

Sunshine: “Who are they going to beat, Little Blog?”

Little Blog: “Arsenal!”

Dad: “I don’t think so, Little Blog.”

Little Blog: “Manchester United!”

Sunshine rolls her eyes.

“It isn’t soccer, Little Blog, it’s rugby. And they have to play against a country.”

Little Blog’s eyes light up: “I know! It’s England!”

Dad: “That’s right, Little Blog. But why should South Africa win the World Cup?”

Little Blog: “Because it was England’s turn last time, so it’s our turn this time. Everyone has to take turns, isn’t it, Daddy?”

Dad: “Not when countries play, Little Blog. There have to be other reasons why we win.”

Little Blog: “I know! It’s because we all support South Africa!”

Sunshine decides it’s time to apply ruthless logic: “But don’t you think all the people in England support England?”

A glint of steel appears in Little Blog’s eyes: “But we support South Africa lots harder than England supports England!”

(Next: Little Blog finds an extra slab of chocolate under her pillow)


Little Blog vs Bad Drivers

Little Blog is sitting in the back of Dad’s car, on the way to gym. Sunshine, her big sister, is with Mom, so Little Blog gets in all the running commentary she can.

First she describes the inside of the car, and asks for an explanation of almost every feature, from the air bags to the air conditioner.

Next, she turns her attention to other cars on the road. She describes each car as it passes in the next lane. One car comes speeding up from behind, zips into the next lane, and zooms into the lane in front of Dad, barely missing his front bumper.

“Idiot!” shouts Dad.

“Why is he an idiot, Daddy?” asks Little Blog.

“Because he could have gone into our car, Little Blog.”

Little Blog: “If he goes into another car, will it break the other car?”

Dad: “Yes, Little Blog.”

Little Blog: “That’s dangerous!”

Dad: “It sure is, Little Blog.”

Little Blog: “And it’s dangerous for children to sit in the front.”

Dad: “Why, Little Blog?”

Little Blog: “Because of what will happen if another car breaks your car.”

Dad: “What will happen, Little Blog?”

Little Blog: “The beanbag will come out and squash the child.”

(News flash: Chinese government denies rumours of factories producing defective children’s furniture)